A Master at Work

Went out with Matt. He's off doing some bullshit and I am wandering around like a jagbird staring at my cell phone. These three hot girls are at the bar and I manage to WALK SQUARE INTO ONE OF THEIR CIGARETTES. SO, now the flame is like on my shirt and they're like OH MY GOD! Trying to get it out. I tell them they're horrible and one REALLY FUCKING CUTE with one of those nose piercings and she goes "that's how we do." And instead of continuing the conversation with her, which she was clearly attempting to do, I wander off like a jerk! MAN!! What the fuck is this panicking ass shit that I do???

I need to read that "Embarrassed.." book and follow that shit. I need to get out and be FUCKING CRAZY AND TALK TO EVERYONE.

Day 2: Saturday Night

Okay, let me start off by saying that HOLY SHIT there are a ridiculous amount of BEAUTIFUL girls wandering this city. They got the blond hair and the sparkly shit all over the eyes.

Shit is crazy - I'm helpless to it...no choice, gotta play this game even though the deck seems to be stacked against my silly ass.

The reason I say all this deck garbage is that I don't have great physical genes. Even my mom says this crap...that we're all fat shits who don't have nice faces. Instead, we have ghoulish faces.

That having been said, tonight was even worse for me than the previous. Last night at least I got INSIDE the dumbass establishment...

Tonight I decided to drive my ass around for damn near an hour...than LEFT then went to Purday, drove around for GODDAMN NEAR half an hour....LEFT!

The "reason" was that there was a big ass line out front...

But I learned:

A. I want to be prepared (as I should be with other things...this has nothing to do with my image --- that can be whatever I choose) and feel ready and know kind of what I'm supposed to say to the girls I approach.

B. I want to always look my best.

C. I want to have a plan beforehand on

1. Where I'm going to go
2. Who I'm going with
3. What time I should get there

Number two needs some focus because I have NO FUCKING WING!

Goddamn, I got a lot of work to do.

Day 1

To test out my ability with the ladies, I went to a downtown club. That shit turned into an A1 fucksaster!

I was all confident and shit because I saw those pickup guys on goddamn VH1 doing all this bullshit, but sure enough, the second I walked into that motherfucker I FREAKED OUT!

Froze up, couldn't say shit, felt TINY!

I'm very intimidated by all these bouncer and club characters and all that shit...so that probably starts it off...